Thought I would kick this catergory off with an extract from "The Darwin Awards" that I read some time ago now but still makes me laugh out loud every time I read it!

True Story From Michigan, USA.
(Nothing this absurd could be fiction!) It's January
in Michigan and a guy buys a brand new
Grand Cherokee Jeep for $40,000+, & has $600.00+ in monthly
payments. He's pretty proud of this rig, & gets a hold of his friend
to do some male bonding with the new ride. They go duck
hunting & of course all the lakes are frozen. These two Atomic
Brains go to the lake with their guns, the dog, the beer & of
course the new vehicle. They drive out onto the ice.

Now, they want to make some kind of a natural landing area to
attract ducks -something their decoy ducks will float on and
attract the real ducks. Remember it's all ice, & in order to
make a hole large enough to interest a flock
of ducks -a hole big enough to entice ducks to land- they needed
to use a little more than an ice fishing hole drill. Sooooo, out of
the back of the brand-new Jeep Grand Cherokee comes a stick
of dynamite with a short 40-second fuse. To their credit, these
two rocket scientists DID take into consideration that if they
placed the stick of dynamite on the ice at a location far from
where they (& the new Grand Cherokee) would be waiting & ran
back quickly, they would risk slipping on the ice as they ran from
the imminent explosion & could possibly go up in smoke with the
resulting blast.

After a little deliberation, they come up with a brilliant idea --
THROWING the dynamite, which is what they end up doing.
Remember a couple of paragraphs back, I mentioned the
vehicle, the beer, the guns &THE DOG ???? Yes, the dog. The
driver's pet Black Labrador (used for retrieving-especially things
thrown by the owner). You guessed it, the dog takes off at a high
rate of doggy speed on the ice, reaching the stick of dynamite
with the burning 40 second fuse about the time it hits the ice - all
to the woe of the two idiots who are now yelling, stomping feet,
waving arms & wondering what the heck to do. The dog is
happy & now heads back toward the "hunters" with the stick of
dynamite.

I think we all can picture the ever-increasing concern on the part
of the brain trust, as the loyal Labrador Retriever approaches.
The Bozos now are REALLY waving their arms-shouting even
louder & generally feeling kinda panicked. Now finally one of the
guys decides to think - something that neither had done before
this moment, he grabs a shotgun and has no choice other than
to shoot at the dog. This sounds better than it really is,
because the shotgun was loaded with
duck shot & hardly effective enough to stop a Black Lab. The
dog DID stop for a moment, slightly confused, but then continued
on. Another shot, & this time the dog-still standing, became
REALLY confused & of course scared. Thinking that these two
Nobel Prize Winners have gone TOTALLY insane, the pooch
takes off to find cover with a now extremely short fuse still
burning on the stick of dynamite. The cover the dogs finds?
Underneath the brand new Grand Cherokee worth 40-some
thousand dollars - the $600.00+ monthly payment vehicle that is
sitting nearby on the lake ice.

KA-BOOM!

Dog dies, what's left of the vehicle sinks to bottom of the lake, &
these two "Co- Leaders of the Known Universe" are left standing
there with this "I can't believe this happened to me" look on their
faces. Later, the owner of the vehicle calls his insurance
company & is promptly informed that sinking a vehicle in a lake
by illegal use of explosives is NOT covered on his policy. He had
yet to make his first car payment.

poor dog!!

But its a funny story.... would have been funnier if the dog just dropped it under the car and blew the legs off the 2 men

Oh that reminds me of Monarch of The Glen, when they try to blow up a pike but the dog called Useless tries to be erm, useful - click